Day 21.

twenty one days today, and i am only counting for the sake of the blog. Its not like, i am being tortured or I cant wait for this to end. I wasn't forced into this, on the contrary, i was advised not to do it. 

Even though this blog is after my attept to be silent, it reflects my opinion as Stavros Lambrakis, silent or not. All the observations  I make are filtered by my past 27 years of life. It would be stupid to assume that I am having this "profound" realizations because of silence. What I am trying to say is that I am still the same, still sensitive to certain comments and behaviors. 

I am irritated by doubters. Everywhere I go, and just for the record i never instigate conversation first, people doubt what i do and why i am doing it. It makes me mad, because it is a personal choice and you think you can so easily comment on it? I am so tired of this that i decided not to use notes anymore. I will use the basic cards and nothing else. No explanation, no justification, no more defending of what i do to those that don't matter.

next.

I feel even more distant than usual. I have become more judgemental of human behavior and "interaction". Maybe it is just a wave of pessimism that i often ride, but being silent is like being ec-static. Its as if i exit my body and watch things (including myself) from a more objective point of view. How is this poor communication enough? I thought we, as humans, are not as easily satisfied, simply because we have elaborating minds to seek for the best. I don't understand people that compromise when it comes to serious issues.